Well, these are my tips 🙂 My husband and I have been together for 11 years. We have 2 children and 2 cats, we rent our home we’re still saving for things, we have NO debts (yay 😀 ). My husband works shifts so it is hard at time to get the time to see him but we make an effort. I’m at home and studying to be a bookkeeper at college.
Anyway, we’re still happy 🙂 We have slip ups, but to be honest that’s either because I’m going through the cycle or my husband has attempted to do something nice but has gone the wrong way about it lol.
Here are tips that my Grandad told me a week before my wedding day, and we’ve stuck by this always 🙂
- Never sleep on an argument. You wouldn’t believe the amount of people I’ve spoken to who have ended their conversations ‘So I just slammed the door and went to bed’. No no no! Doing this means that in the morning you wake up to what should be a new day, instead you’re still in the middle of this unsolved argument. You’ll wake up either feeling upset, angry, resentful, perhaps even shy or you may realise you were infact wrong but you’re too stubborn to say sorry now. Fix the problem as soon as it comes. Say your ‘sorrys’ and find solutions if you need it. Cuddle and smile.
- Carry on courting. Being married or in a long term relationship does not mean that it should all lead down hill after the first year or so. You shouldn’t expect the spark in your life to just die away. Go on a date each week or once a month. Perhaps it’s a breakfast date, a lunch date, or an evening date. You don’t need money either so no using that as an excuse! Just the two of you could grab your coats and boots and have a nice walk together, just holding hands, exploring new areas etc. If you have children, then find a babysitter that you trust. You could go out together to the local pub, try something new, go for dinner, or just do the weekly shop together without the kids at your feet. You need time together! It will be a day that you get all excited about and start counting down the days 🙂
- Listen to each other. You really should listen to each other, it’s the only way you will learn when the other is upset or what the other wants. So many people don’t communicate and I find that men tend to be worse at this, they don’t like to talk about things as much, but I guess for a woman to continually ask him over and over again, it can become annoying and maybe this barrier comes up. But BOTH men and women need to remember that if they don’t talk to each other, how on earth are they meant to know what you’re thinking? I tend to catch my husband more at bed time lol – it’s when my body is the most relaxed and I’m no longer doing anything which leads my mind to race and think about things. It is annoying for him I know lol, but I’ve acknowledged that this is the wrong time and I’m therefore not upset when I hear his snores.
- Do not cheat. It’s not nice. If you truly loved your partner then you wouldn’t cheat. So many people say ‘oh it was just in the moment’, but no, surely your partners face would have come up in your mind. You’d think about what pain this would put them through. If you’re not getting on, then either try and make it work somehow or end the relationship first.
- Have fun. Don’t get too boring lol. Have fun still, muck about, play fight etc. It’s all in good nature and you never know what the outcome may be if you’re/they’re lucky lol 😉